Emotional Labor
Oh lord I am tired.
There is always so much to do, even in down time, that it can be so overwhelming.
The actual "doing" of the things is never as hard as the "thinking" of/about the things.
We need milk/dog food/field trip money.
We need to schedule a dentist appointment/pick up the kids from practice/go to the accountant.
Do you have shorts that fit/have I sent that bill/did I respond to that email/.
Remember that I need you off work early/did you fix this/.
What groceries do we need/when will I shop/what do you want to eat/oh you don't like that anymore.
As much as I love to plan and make lists and organize, even MY brain gets full. It is not the DOING but the THINKING.
And no, I can't just let it go because then things won't get done. Even in an egalitarian relationship where partners are equal, there is still the tendency for one partner to do the delegating of the tasks which still means work. The mental work of knowing all the things that have to be done. Emotional labor cannot be broken down into lists.
And yes, I know I have a fan-fucking-tastic life. This isn't about gratitude. I am beyond grateful for what I have. But even when we are happy, even when are #blessed, even when life is good, we are allowed to struggle. Struggling doesn't diminish these things.
And friends, right now, mama is tired. My brain is so ready for a break. Spring Break, as a matter of fact.
There is always so much to do, even in down time, that it can be so overwhelming.
The actual "doing" of the things is never as hard as the "thinking" of/about the things.
We need milk/dog food/field trip money.
We need to schedule a dentist appointment/pick up the kids from practice/go to the accountant.
Do you have shorts that fit/have I sent that bill/did I respond to that email/.
Remember that I need you off work early/did you fix this/.
What groceries do we need/when will I shop/what do you want to eat/oh you don't like that anymore.
As much as I love to plan and make lists and organize, even MY brain gets full. It is not the DOING but the THINKING.
And no, I can't just let it go because then things won't get done. Even in an egalitarian relationship where partners are equal, there is still the tendency for one partner to do the delegating of the tasks which still means work. The mental work of knowing all the things that have to be done. Emotional labor cannot be broken down into lists.
And yes, I know I have a fan-fucking-tastic life. This isn't about gratitude. I am beyond grateful for what I have. But even when we are happy, even when are #blessed, even when life is good, we are allowed to struggle. Struggling doesn't diminish these things.
And friends, right now, mama is tired. My brain is so ready for a break. Spring Break, as a matter of fact.
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